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Showing posts from March, 2022

Continuation

Ministry houses. Like I said, I loved living with a bunch of like-minded people. They were my best friends and the people with whom I spent the most time.  The problems were/are... 1) Very little boundaries.  2) Very little ownership. 3) Too much interdependence, creating lack of self. I could go on and on. The reason why I am blogging is to simply sort the many thoughts and opinions I have. This will most likely help no one but myself.  Let's start with boundaries.  You're encouraged to share everything with your roommates and women in your bible study and in a timely manner. Especially your discipler and especially if its sin related. In ministry houses this can feel and be tricky. What if a new girl moves in you've never met before, or if you simply don't feel comfortable with a roommate.  It didn't matter. Why? Because you should be secure in your relationship with God. Because you need to be accountable for your issues and sins so that nothing is hidden.  The i

Reconstructing my faith (My concerns pt. 1)

 The weird things I mentioned previously concerning my time in my previous church, have me still concerned. First, these things have not changed at all since I've left even amidst major criticism. Second, there are still many people I care about deeply invested in the church. I want to discuss what I think is the most controversial issue. Ministry houses.  A network of homes leased by college students or young adults who are in active ministry. Not anyone can move it, it is for those who are committed to attending the meetings, discipleship, and abstaining from worldly pleasures. I believe that when you are young it can be extremely beneficial to move out and live with roommates. It can be a very teachable time and helpful for learning life skills, especially if you go on to get married and have children.  I believe that many people who have lived in ministry houses have benefitted from them. I did. I learned how to live with many different types of people. I learned a lot about pa

Reconstructing my faith (A Blind Follower)

 I was a blind follower. What I needed was acceptance and affirmation and that's what I was given. I would consider some of the actions of my previous church/community as weird or wrong, but would just assume that I was the one that was weird or wrong.  We met three times a week. Those who were really committed did at least. I remember it taking me about 6 months to fully commit and there was a lot of different pressures. The structure of the church was so: you attend a small intimate meeting with 20-30 members in a home, and then you attend a large meeting at a facility, and then if you truly wanted to be integrated you attended a same-sex meeting at the end of the week, typically Friday nights. Each meeting started at 8pm. But one integral part of the church was discipleship. In order to be truly committed to the church you needed to be discipled and more importantly you needed to disciple. I was considered "free game" because a boy brought me out and a girl was appoint

Reconstructing my faith

It has taken me a very long time to sit down and begin to write. To be honest, I am blogging because my storage is full on google docs.  I remember turning twenty. I had just met a ton of new friends and reignited my passion for following Christ.  The previous year, my nineteenth was one of the hardest of my life. I was sad and I felt very alone. I was ashamed of myself and who I was. I wanted my old friendships but some I could not have and others were busy traveling or getting married. I attended community college and failed miserably at making new friends.  I wasn't attending a church regularly since I worked in the dining room at an assisted living home Sunday mornings.  I was in a strange place in my life at nineteen.  I missed community and knew I wanted to learn more about God. I desired to sharpen my knowledge of the bible. I also had a passion for sharing my faith and tried to challenge myself to be more "out there" instead of constantly in my head.  One day, I g